Thinking Out Loud

It is a small step yet one of profound consequences. Scary-easy, is how I would describe the shift from a God dependent lifestyle to a self competent lifestyle. From a sense of desperate passion to be with God (i.e. have Him actively present now) to desperately driven by my "stuff" and daily tasks.

As one who declares "I want to trust in the Lord with all my heart," I am alarmed by how casually I move through a day and, with the exception of some express prayers, give such little regard to my Lord. If Jesus did the things He saw his Father doing, should I not actively be looking for what Father is doing now? Should I not be actively listening to what Father is saying now?

I've studied, I've read, I've trained and I'm experienced in some things that others might deem me to be good at. Sort of like Tozer's observations of the church in his day. So good had the church become at "doing church" that the Holy Spirits absence would hardly be recognized.

I'm just thinking out loud and some of my thoughts are troubling me.

Mother's Day Without a Mom

I thought a lot about my momma this past Mother's Day. It was the first one in my 53 years without her. This time I could not call her, send her a card, buy her a gift or take her out to a favorite restaurant.

It's true I was on the other side of the world in a place called Kurdistan. She never went to Kurdistan. She never traveled very far outside of the one place she always called home. Maybe that's why it was such a thrill for me to phone her upon my return from places like Kurdistan. She was always full of questions about places her eyes would never see but her mind wanted to imagine. Every adventure I have followed God on has been deeply transforming in my life. Trying to describe that to others can sometimes be a tad disappointing. Fidgeting, yawns and general apathy can quickly lead to putting away the "vacation slides."

I missed my mom this Mothers Day. I miss her more upon my return. She would have loved Kurdistan and listened so intensely as I described my experiences there.

Speaking in Amman

Last Sunday it was my delight to speak in a church in Amman, Jordan. Just before beginning my message, a woman with a powerful voice sang a medley of songs reminding us of God's love and watchful care of His redeemed. Of course these songs were sung in Arabic but the tune was familiar enough that I could sing it in English. I love moments like these, two cultures, two languages united in worship of the God who binds our hearts as one with His.

As the lady stepped down from the platform my translator asked, "Where in the US are you from?" "Birmingham, Alabama" I replied. That's when he told me something that was so strange I could hardly believe it. "That lady who just sang, she lives in Birmingham." Funny thing is, I could not detect any "southern" Arabic is all she said. Never did find out if there is an Arabic equivalent for ya'll.